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a series of thoughts

I’m packing my room and I see my life boiled down to a series of labels such as leathercrafting supplies and movies & pets (books and dvds) or shoes, winter clothes.

I read a blog post by a friend.  Color-vivid color.  I want that so desperately in my life yet all I see are shades of gray.  Where is my color?

I continue to box up my room.  What is my future?  Am I making the right decision?  Where do I go next?  My mind races and I feel my anxiety creep up.  But a still small voices whispers to me that is not your concern.  Did I not promise to take care of you? (Matthew 6:26)  And tears fill my eyes and I look down to my arm and read the inscriptions tattooed upon it.  One reads, courage dear heart, and it reminds me of John 16:33 ‘Take heart!  For I have already overcome the world.’  My heart calms and I feel thankful.  I’m never alone.  Not ever.  He is always with me.  He tells me to take courage, for He has already overcome the world.

I sit down to pen my thoughts.  My mind is wandering and I’m not sure what’s around the next corner.  I just know that it’s good.  Because He is good.  I feel a peace, and my heart swells.  Gratefulness fills me-and I realize what a good, good father He is.  I may not have it all together, but that’s ok.  He doesn’t ask me to have it all together.  He just asks me to love Him and to follow after Him with all of my heart.  And, Jesus?  I give it to you.  My past, present and whatever the future may hold.  I give it all to you.